Do My Words Have Worth?

A few small moments of reading two anonymous comments on older posts of mine, reading along the lines of, Oh c'mon. Get a life and grow up. They stung a little. And I deleted them. This happened a few months ago. I have moments now where these comments come back to taunt me and my written voice here. 
Do my words matter?
Do they have value here?
I'll be upfront and say I don't write for anybody on this blog or even as I write my novels. I'm not about keeping up with popular blogging trends, gaining readership for numbers and stats. Disclaimer: This is not to say I begrudge others their own blogging success or judge the number of followers on other blogs. To each their happy own.
I'm not going to strive to please people with my words, because the words fall flat and aren't genuine.
So why do those anonymous comments still haunt me and bring me down?
Because they spiral me downward into the thoughts of, Why bother writing? Who cares what you have to say? You write repetitively. You haven't lived much life to really write about. And that isn't even mentioning the comparison game I fall into with other blogs I read. 
This is a very real struggle for me; it's difficult to be transparent about them when it's easier to spin words over the surface and not share my imperfect, learning heart. It's why I took a quiet step back away from blogging this past month even though I had only just published my first novel.
It's a battle of my mind. I have the choice to either dwell on these self-harmful thoughts, or rebuke them in Jesus' name that says I am redeemed. A precious daughter of God who has many, many words to write for Him alone. 
Writing here about anything and everything is truly cathartic for me. The Lord speaks to me as I type hurriedly, and in those moments where I type hesitantly, like this post. My life is simple, good and full. I am learning much, loving much and I would honestly not change a thing. No--not even my relationship status. 
So why do I write here?
Because my words are my heart.
My words spill forth because of the calling my loving Lord has placed upon my life. And because of Him and His renewing work in my life--my words matter.
In addition:
What I mean by saying I don't write for "anybody" is that I don't write to please people or to keep the numbers up. I love the friendships, writerly camaraderie and fellowship we bloggers have and I am grateful to God for you.
Meghan Gorecki
Meghan Gorecki

Words, history, and grace color my days here in The Burgh where I seek out the perfect coffee and red lipstick.

7 comments:

  1. Dear, sweet Meghan, you hold tight to that calling God has placed on your life. Your words here, they inspire me, and God has used them time and again to bring me closer to Himself. I only wish my talent for word-crafting was half as developed as yours. Keep pouring out your heart, m'dear!
    Hugs galore,
    Micaela <3

    www.micaela419.wordpress.com

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  2. You are an inspiration to me, Meghan. I've made notes of sentences that really encouraged me in God's Will. Keep up the good work of using your gift for God! =)

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  3. Amen, good post! Trying to please people doesn't work because we can't make everyone happy; we just need to please God! People won't judge us on Judgment Day, only God will. You're doing the right thing! Keep up the good work sister ;)

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  4. Hey, Meghan.

    I *love* reading your posts. You keep on writing what's on your mind! Paul says in 2 Cor. 10:12 that we shouldn't compare ourselves among ourselves. Earlier, in 1 Cor. 7:17 he says "Only let each person lead the life that the Lord has assigned to him, and to which God has called him." You are doing fantastic, Meghan. Keep following His call! :)

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  5. people always take time out of there day to be mean, i think you have touched countless people with your words, who never took the time to let you know. meanness is always easier than transparency.
    We all feel this at some stage or anther, or in some cases they never go away, am I good enough, am I worthy, I know the ache of feeling inferior to other blogs, oh how I know. Gaining confidence in this thing called life or our chosen way (or should I say the way that chose us) to express ourselves, such as bleeding our deepest feelings onto to a page, is a terrible fight. Yet God is there, he'll comfort you better than anyone else. We fight to find meaning in this writing our heart, because if we have no meaning then we have this idea that were tragically waisting our life.
    But meaning only comes from the Lord, which I'm sure you know, and if he's called you which you wouldn't be writing if you didn't think so, than hell make you into the writer the encourager you were meant to be. I have to tell you of all the times your transparency has compelled me to look deeper, its refreshing to see in a world of perfect little blogs and forged sentences. your you and that is enough.
    Keep on fighting, by the way you published a book ? when did that happen ?
    I feel so out of the loop.
    Blessings Rachel Hope

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  6. Our worth and meaning come from Jesus and what HE thinks of us! He says that we are fearfully and wonderfully made. He knows the very thoughts we have, the number of hairs on our head, and our dreams and desires and loves us so much! What a great encouragement to not write for the "critics" and strangers who read your posts, but to write from your heart and honor Christ while doing so! Keep it up chica!
    -Natalie

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