December 7, 2015

Head Spinning Goodness & Grace


2015 is almost over and what a year it has been. It started out pretty special, having our Idaho sister visit for the last time before she became a Mrs, then my grandfather had a triple bypass heart surgery that set the rest of the winter to go upside down where we all did what needed to be done, and got through it. 
When spring came I finally made an appointment with a new orthopedic doctor because my hip pain had escalated so badly. Turned out both labrums were torn, there is severe arthritis and each and oh--I could have a surgery this year on the right to greatly decrease pain on that side for 15-20yrs. But if I waited till 2016, probably could not have it done due to the degenerative nature of my hip disability.
That same late winter/early spring, two other dear friends met their special someones and in May my best friend got engaged and in June I visited her for a long weekend to meet the guy. All these guys feel like they've been a part of my friends' lives for longer than almost a year, and are everything and more I've ever prayed for them.
Surgery on my 22nd birthday marked the beginning of a new lease on life from my most gracious Lord. The lover of my soul I would come to rely on even more intimately in the coming months of recovering, losing almost all my independence, having an infection and a second, more difficult surgery two weeks later, IV antibiotics for 6wks and the best support system of loving friends and family I could ever ask for. All the people who helped and visited and brought meals acted out Jesus to me and my family. The healing time was a humbling one I will never, ever please Lord, forget...nor especially this head spinning time of learning the secret of trusting God so as to not freak out.
I have submitted my baby novel and been rejected a few times over this year and quite possibly may another time before the year is out. I had a miracle of this surgery dropped in my lap and had to have the blind faith to say to God with tears in my eyes, "You know best." I have had bones broken, a long scar carved on my leg, and have healed. I am branching out and going after what I want and seeing where it leads and learning more about myself and God in the process. 
2015 certainly did not turn out like I could have ever imagined or even hoped--and it was so much better. 
My head is spinning at the thought of God's immense grace and goodness this year, at the work He is doing right *now* and what He has for my future.
My work, my words, my heart are Yours, Lord God.
Bring on 2016. 
Who knows but God the places I'll go, the people I'll meet, the things that'll happen...but it will all be good. Even the hard heartaches sure to come. He who holds my heart will never let it fall and even when I cannot see, He will uphold me to walk the road He's laid out for me.