July 7, 2017

Head to My Heart

This is an installment of our series, Love Life & Literature: Romance in Real Life. In this series, we (myself and Rachael) will be delving into the ups, downs, frustrations, butterflies, and everything in between as career women who love romance, but are still searching in a world that isn’t all Mr. Darcy’s and Prince Charming’s.

Show of hands.
Anyone here know all the right things to say, to cling to, to remember? And what to shove aside and not pay any mind to though the worst parts of us flare and niggle at our confidence and faith day in and day out?
It's all up in our heads, right? The truths we know. Even the Bible verses that remind us Whose we are and who we are. But sometimes our hearts get tired. Of the waiting and wondering and feeling about two inches tall when yet another person in our acquaintance falls in love. Or you hear the "It'll happen when you least expect it" or other similar formulaic well-meant platitudes.
We get it. We know. The head knowledge is there. But it takes such a long time and so much exhausting effort for that head knowledge to trickle down to our hearts.
Hearts that wonder what is wrong with them. Hearts that have hoped and hoped and hoped with each passing year This Big Dream of a Special Someone gets further deferred and postponed and all those smaller girlhood dreams beneath that One Big One slowly but surely evaporate.
Is it just me? Can anyone relate? 
I don't know about you but often times self reflection such as this can turn into self-flailing, where there's very little grace. It is in these times where the cycle of waiting and wondering and contentment and restlessness and loving your life yet still waiting for that elusive Dream of Someday, that I need to call to mind these words (taken from The Message Bible because sometimes you need familiar truths retold in a fresh way):

Now that we know what we have—Jesus, this great High Priest with ready access to God—let’s not let it slip through our fingers. We don’t have a priest who is out of touch with our reality. He’s been through weakness and testing, experienced it all—all but the sin. So let’s walk right up to him and get what he is so ready to give. Take the mercy, accept the help.

Hebrews 4:14-16

He's right there by our side. As near as breathing—and He's been through it all. Every mountain high and valley low of emotion, even. And above all what we must remember and act upon? Jesus was honest with His father. He was fully God and fully man but still asked that the cup of suffering be taken from Him in the Garden of Gethsemane. Even though He knew full well it wasn't God's plan. So we must be honest with Him. I have consistent trouble with that, to be honest. But in order for us not to numb our feelings and the hurt that this waiting/dating game can bring—we must be honest. And being consistent in this will get those truths embedded in our heads, down into our hearts.